Love is not for me…it is for others! ;)

Happy New Year! So?! What is new?!

Well, last year my father-in-law was admitted to intensive care on New Year’s Eve. My husband flew out to Budapest, from San Francisco, at 4pm…We kissed him good-bye, with heavy hearts. We watched him get into his car, while asking the routine questions…Passport? British passport? Hungarian passport? Your Bristish wallet? Your Hungarian cel? Check. Engine on, drive off…No tears: at times like this we switch on to our British-side-mode, and it helps! With my toddler in my arms, my girls by my side, we came back inside and got on with life. After about 40 minutes, phone rings and I am given some instructions:

‘Don’t forget the pork leg in the fridge, Adri…you should really do it…some lemon, rosemary, black pepper, stick some garlic in…’ You should really do it, Adri…’

‘No, I’ll just make something real simple…don’t worry’ (this is me pretending to be low-key when what I was really thinking was: Yuk, yuk, yuk! No way I will touch red meat and stick garlic in it? Who me? You’ve got be kidding, right? How long have we been married?!).

So, last night, we had roast pork. We had  a delicious Brazilian dessert, we had a laugh (small one, but we did!), we had 4 of us instead of 5, sitting at the dinner table, for New Year’s Eve. We took few pictures, we went outside and screamed: Happy New Year!!!

I often thought of nagypapa (grandpa), I prayed for him to be given one more chance…to live 10 more years, in health. I hoped and still do hope for the best. Not only for nagypapa, but for the best in me. Because, I will need it! I need to be light/luz even when I feel like a zombie! I need to be a luminous zombie, right now, this morning!

Last night, I slaved in my kitchen for my children, I put up a brave face for my husband, I went to bed after 3am (3 teens at home, sleepover, need I say more?) and Happy New Year! At 6am, someone was hungry, needed a poo-poo and wanted to know right then: Is the dessert ready?! Hu?! Wait! Let me find myself under this duvet! Gosh! I am a mother! It is New Year and I got no new boobs (I know an awesome girl who gave herself this gift for 2014: the gift of brand new boobs!), no husband, no resolutions, no plans! lol

Happy New Year?!? I am writing and listening to Thomas the Tank Engine in the background. Is it deja vous or are we really in 2014?!

We know that life throws us curve balls. But we also know we can catch them, or we can drop them, too. You know my take on this one…

Yes, for me it is a Happy New Year! Nagypapa is a bit better, my kids are healthy and happy, my husband is by his dad’s side, with his sweet mom, his awfully strong sister and ever so centered and good hearted brother. And I? I am right here, waiting for him to come back home. And I tell you; when this man gets home, I will not be a zombie. Promise!

Happy New Year!

Adri xxx

HWhat is the use of living, if it be not to strive for noble causes and to make this muddled world a better place for those who will live in it after we are gone?




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